


The Nein Days of Weihnachten

by brunetta6, Mamabatz



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: AND ALL THE FAMILIES OF THE M9, CMON DOWN, Christmas, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Marriage Proposal, also caleb's dad is alive, barely any plot, but this has facets in it that i imagine for the endgame of it, its a cr2 hallmark movie, literally just smut and holiday fluff, so yeah HAVE YOU EVER WANTED TO SEE THE CLAY CLAN AND MARION IN THE SAME ROOM, thd isn't finished and it won't be for a long time
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-18
Updated: 2020-12-18
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:34:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28155441
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brunetta6/pseuds/brunetta6, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mamabatz/pseuds/Mamabatz
Summary: Upon hearing about the Dwendalian Empire's winter holiday of candles, gifts, and family, the Mighty Nein pull together an old-fashioned gathering with all of their relatives.  Chaos, baking, sex, and proposals run amok.  (+ contains spoilers for Three-Headed Dog)
Relationships: Beauregard Lionett/Yasha, Fjord/Jester Lavorre/Caleb Widogast
Comments: 1
Kudos: 11





	The Nein Days of Weihnachten

“A-Ahh… _ahhh… Caleb…”_

“Shhh…” Caleb breathed softly. His breath tickled against Jester’s ear, her thighs twitching gently against the heat of his body as she reached around both of her men with muscular arms. Caleb felt more than saw her grab two handfuls of Fjord’s ass and _pull_ them both closer. Stars popped behind his eyes, Fjord’s cock pressing _hard_ into him, even as the pressure buried him even deeper inside Jester. “O-oh… ah… a-ah ah… ah _scheiße…! Fuck…_ ah…”

He reached back blindly, grabbing at Fjord’s hip and tenderly guiding Jester’s hands. _“Ja…_ j-just… make him… right there… Yes… ah…” he panted. He had to take his weight back onto his elbows or else collapse. Every bone in his body was turning to hot, melting jelly as Fjord’s hips nestled balls deep into him, Jester’s soaked pussy squeezing around him. “Just a-a… little…!”

Jester felt him shiver. “M-More…!” Caleb gasped, trembling between them.

She felt him come inside her, his head thrown back in rapture above her. _“Ah—! A-ah ahh…_ ah… ah…”

Jester felt his slender body go lax between them, his eyes soft and glazed over as he rested his head between her breasts. Fjord immediately picked up the pace, flushed and gasping; Caleb groaned quietly between them, hiding his face and enjoying the friction. Jester let her eyes roll back, their wizard’s half-hard cock pushed into her core. “Ah— oh, fuck, Fjord, faster—!! Fast—!”

Her pussy pulsed under the past half hour of care she had thrived under, her third, softest orgasm rolling over her like a wave in a hot tub, taking her over its sweet crest. Fjord swore violently, hid his face in Caleb’s hair, and pressed both of them down into the bed, emptying himself inside their wizard.

Caleb shivered softly and reached back for him. “Gut… dass du es so gut gemacht hast…” he exhaled, kissing Fjord’s cheek, damp with post-coital sweat.

Fjord groaned and turned his face, claiming his lips breathlessly. “Caleb…”

The two men kissed — heated, lazy, and loving — tongue tenderly twining where Jester could see… until finally, Fjord came back to himself, slowly catching his breath. “You two alright…?” he whispered.

“More than alright.” Caleb kissed him sweetly once more, gently kissing one small tusk, then the other. Fjord always needed reassurance after sex, but it was the sweetest thing he could imagine; this large, gorgeous half orc, checking to see that his partners weren’t hurt. “As always, Fjord…”

Jester purred happily, accepting a kiss from Caleb and letting the redhead untangle himself from the pile. Fjord took Caleb’s spot inside her, pressing warm, happy kisses to her lips and cheeks as Caleb got up and put on his robe. It was a regular routine; well practiced and washed with love. “You’re so pretty…” Fjord was whispering against her lips. “So strong, Jester…”

“I know~” she giggled. “You’re super strong too, Fjord~”

“Thanks~”

They both glanced over at Caleb, who had taken his spot in his armchair, just watching the pair of them snuggle sweetly in bed. Fjord blushed and hid his face in her neck, while Jester stuck her tongue out playfully at him. Caleb smirked and stuck his tongue right back out at her.

Their shared room in Widogast’s Nascent Nein-Sided Tower was draped in warm velvets and lights, the mantle ablaze with crackling orange and hickory smoke, glowing beneath a galaxy of floating candles. Decorative magical orbs of light — of all colors, red, green, blue, white, gold, pink and purple — blinked in the corners of the room. Caleb had just begun to decorate the tower this way just this week, as the final few days of the calendar year approached. Neither Fjord nor Jester knew what it was about, but as they lay there… throbbing gently in the aftermath of pleasure… they just basked in the multicolored lights, enjoying their beauty.

“It’s gorgeous,” Fjord murmured.

“Uh huh…” Jester whispered, her arms wrapped happily around the paladin’s naked body. She peeked over him, looking at Caleb. “What are they for?”

Caleb blinked in surprise. “The— those?”

“Ya!”

“Oh…” Caleb murmured, brows raised in bewilderment. “I— I didn’t know you weren’t aware. You two have never heard of Weihnachten?”

They shook their heads.

“Candle nights?”

They looked at each other, then shook their heads again. Caleb rubbed his mouth, surprised. “Hah. I suppose it _is_ just an Empire thing…” he mumbled to himself. “How bizarre. I never thought of that.”

“What’s We—Weinakten?” Fjord asked curiously, adjusting his weight so that they could still be entwined and both look at Caleb.

“Waaaayknocked—“ Jester tried to say.

“Win noch.”

“Weenoktin.”

“ _Weihnachten_ ,” Caleb corrected them, biting back a grin at their butchered pronunciations. “Consecrated Night, or Candle Nights, as it has become. It is a winter holiday in the Dwendalian Empire. Originally, it celebrated the end of the war with the Julous Dominion, nearly three hundred years ago. Soldiers came home after that long fight, brought their spoils of war home to their families, and lit candles to honor those whom had sacrificed their lives for the Empire. Now, every year, those of Western Wynandir celebrate by giving gifts to their friends and family, gathering together in one house, and lighting candles on the darkest nights of the year… to show that we treasure our families, and mourn the ones that have passed.”

“Do you only light candles on one night?” Fjord asked, bright eyed and fascinated.

“It used to be just the one night, on the winter solstice,” Caleb explained. “However, in centuries past we have come to light them for nine consecutive nights leading up to the darkest night of the year, to represent how long it took the soldiers to march home from the Marrow War.”

He sighed sweetly with nostalgia. “Ahh, you should see Rexxentrum… there is a great lantern lighting festival in the city around this time of year. The Academy was truly a sight to behold during Weihnachten, back in my days there… And the _drinking_ and the _parties,_ and the _drinking...”_

Jester giggled. “You said drinking twice, Cayleb!” 

“Ah, yes, there is a _lot_ of drinking during Weihnachten. _No_ self respecting Zemnian man is sober during _Weihnachten!”_ Caleb declared, his accent bright and delighted, as if he were quoting someone else. He sighed again, gazing up at the floating lights. “I suppose this is as close as I’ve come to seeing the lantern lighting in a long time…”

Jester frowned, head cocked in puzzlement. "How come?"

"I… blueberry, you know _why--"_

"Noooo, I mean... what's stopping you now?" she asked curiously, disentangling herself from Fjord just a bit. Fjord let her go, pulling a sheet over his privates; he watched -- faintly blushed -- as she stood up completely butt naked, beaming at them both as she enthused over the concept of a Zemnian holiday. "We could go see your dad! We can decorate the whole tower and bring the Nein and Veth's family and-- Oh!! My mama~!! We can bring everyone~!!"

She clapped her hands, getting excited. "It could be so much fun!"

Caleb faltered, almost tripping over his own mental process as he realized. She was _right._ Trent was gone, Astrid and Eodwulf were tucked away in the Vergesson Sanitorium -- admittedly, one more consensual to his placement than the other -- and the Cerberus Assembly was in the process of adjusting its hierarchy and accountability, with the assistance of Emmeline Becker…

Why _couldn’t_ he go?

“A big family night for Weihnachten...” Caleb murmured to himself. 

He glanced up at the pair of them, almost hopefully. “You think everyone would want to?”

“Of _course_ they would,” Fjord insisted, scooting a little closer to the edge of the bed. “We’re filthy rich adventurers! We can rent a big house in town, get everybody there--”

“We can cook _so many cookies!”_ Jester gasped.

“I-- Yes, cookies, like she said. We can have beer and wine, as much alcohol as you and your father could want--”

“And warm milk and pillow forts and sleepovers and adventuring stories!!”

“All of that!”

“Hot cocoa! Games! Presents!” Jester gasped, long and guttural as she slapped her hands to her cheeks. “We could go to the _theaterrrrrrrrrrr._ We could buy tickets for the opera house! We can make snowmen! We can walk around and see all the candle lights! And then we could go to the lantern lighting festival, just like you said! _Ahhhhhh!!_ We can do arts and crafts and _make_ all our own lanterns!! And then light them at the festival! This is going to be more fun than Traveler Con!!”

“All of that! C’mon, Caleb…” Fjord grinned, his yellow eyes softening. “It’ll be great…”

"I could start sending messages!" Jester insisted, beaming at Caleb from her spot draped over Fjord's back. "Let's do it!"

Caleb couldn’t help but feel his body relax, just at the sight of his beautiful lovers. The light glowed off of their soft green and sapphire skin, dancing against gold and silver jewelry and the dusky marks that Jester liked to call love bites. He just smiled at them, warm and content in his own little world for a moment… and finally, he nodded.

“Let’s do it.”

~*~


End file.
